It’s been a few days, I know, but better quality than quantity... perhaps I need to fire my quality assurance and find someone better at their job ;)
Anyways this has recently come to the surface (as in today) and it’s something I feel needs saying on a grander scale. In my Facebook travels today I noticed a debate raging on a friends page about violence towards women. My friend who is a nice girl has a past which involved a particularly unintelligent boy who rather than showing her love and affection, chose to beat her. It took a very unpleasant experience on her part to end that relationship. I will not get into details, or commentary on the cycle of abuse that is sometimes mentioned as I don’t feel overly qualified to discuss it. I do feel it is most undesirable that it exists.
Back to my story, she had posted a comment stating that real men don’t hit women. A couple of what I will confidently say are ignorant young men took up the opposing side of that statement saying that when men hit women it’s because the women provoked it, all of this under the banner of ‘broadening her statement’ and bringing a ‘balanced opinion.‘
This at very least made me want to slap these young men who think that violence, especially against women, can be justified. I am very much of the opinion that violence should be avoided by whatever means necessary. In the end striking out in a violent fashion will only beget more violence. People all too often use violent reactions as their only resort rather than being responsible to the well being of their fellow humans. I admit I’ve had times where I have been blinded by rage and wanted to beat the ever living hell out of someone. But as some of my friends would readily point out, I’m not a fighter, as Matty would say “Mitch is the bearded monk”. I tend to cope with my anger in a far more rational fashion rather than acting it out in a physical, visceral fashion. When people get me to that point there is often a reason for it, whether or not it’s a good one there is a reason. It doesn’t mean that I have to hit them. It also means I don’t have to communicate with them more than necessary. Often the best reaction is time and space, if I have to deal with the person in any sort of official or regular capacity than it can be talked about.
The act of hitting someone because “they were asking for it” is a terrible excuse at best. Justifying acts of violence against anyone because of your inability to discuss your differences is wrong whether you’re John Smith or leader of one of the most powerful nations in the world. If you’re not man enough to discuss your gripes with someone and instead bring them harm, are you really a man? I mean you just did the easy thing and acted on your most base urges.
Now I’m not going and saying that you should be a complete pacifist as there will always be those that think might is right and use strength and violence to get what they want. I would go so far as to say that I won’t be the first person to throw a punch, but at the same time I would defend myself as best I could against someone who decided ‘we’ needed to fight. With no training in martial arts or anything of the like I don’t expect that I’d last long in a fight. I would much rather avoid physical confrontation than get into fisticuffs because I do believe there are better ways of dealing with people rather than imposing your will on their body.
So in the end, I’ll expand on my friends statement. Real men don’t hit anyone. Ignorance is no reason for stupidity, or an excuse for being a thug. If you don’t have the knowledge and mental fortitude to discuss your issues with someone educate yourself. Physical violence is a lazy man’s approach to solving a problem.
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